#cnmac11 for cats

I don't know how I will cope. Ben, your mother is leaving me again. Now you know I don't usually mind going off to Cayton Carr.This time I am a little anxious. I overheard Him saying to THEM that they would miss Wendy . Now Wendy has been my mentor at the Cattery for the last few years. She has metred out my rations, kept my apartment clean,spoken lovingly to me of home,and brushed me. So Wendy has retired. I am going to have to get to know someone new. HE says she sounded very pleasant . I say Will She Like Me. Will she realise that I am a superior Cat. Will she realise that I used to live in London ,and know a thing or three.Will she realise that I am an A list cat?

SHE is going to #cnmac11 and HE is going as her  chaperone.  I hope #cnmac11  is something to do with Cats and the New Media. I have a Twitter Account, I follow many literate and interesting felines. I have featured in publications and monthly periodicals like the Envoy.There is nothing much left for me to learn about the New Media except maybe posterous or css filing . BUT I would like to know why SHE and HE need to go at all. I could tell them everything  they  need to know. 

The Conference season

Well it might be that season for speeches, although I notice that Seaside venues are no longer de rigueur by the political parties of this island nation. I would have thought that Filey could  have been a really suitable venue for a gathering of the nations top political dogs, after all the top cats are here.

Filey has plenty of Band B accommodation of the sort that ordinary people like-clean and good value for money, and wifi when the wind is in the right direction ,and plenty of parking for the Media. After all Filey was the place of Sugartown and Nick Cranes Coast.

It is a good place to shop ,to buy presents for wags or habs*, of phallic rock novelties, and craft necklaces , or Chocs from our well loved shop Sterchis  now in Hope Street.

Filey is also an ideal place for transport links to London or Newcastle, has a landing strip for personal jets at Grindale and a Roman jetty and plenty of places to eat before 6pm.

I of course would make a good politician. I am good to look at, have no trouble speaking my mind, am loyal and well read. Although I have not been to a Public School  I know how to behave in Public, have good manners, and am upright and principled. I have had a small op so am in no danger of being led astray by bad company. 

I am not sure which Political Party is best suited to my talents to lead. I dont like red , blue or orange, green is more my colour, but as a realist I know it is apt to get lost in a garden. 

 I will give it some thought

*Habs- husbands and boyfriends

Pretty on Pink

My Bank Holiday , and the talk of Geriatrica

Rather a daft name for a Monday off I think. I don't have to do my banking on a Monday anyway, and I certainly dont need a holiday from it. I cant reach the ATM anyway, and have to depend on the care of Significant Others for supplying my needs. 

The upside of this day off with no physical  Bank Openings is that the City of London shuts up for the weekend and so you Dear Master don't have to go to work . I am SO GLAD then that you have come to Filey so see me, spend some time with me, admiring me , talking to me, and discussing my age.  You have worked  out my age . I am 16 Human years Old.

I am all there and half way  back , THEY will tell you. I am still in possession of all my cat faculties, I sleep well, eat well , can get around without the use of a carry, can spot a bird at 20metres, and smell chicken scraps coming out of the fridge even when I am at the bottom of the garden. You don't need to have those indelicate talks about me. 

cat years

My admirer , the Editor

Now that the News of the World has gone the way of all flesh and paper, I am about to rise as New star . 

Are they cats? Do they know u can see their roots?

SHE goes to the end of Queen Street and sits for hours at night looking out across the bay just incase SHE can see the Northern Lights or the Perseid Showers. I am not that kind of phenomenal New star, but more the Jedward Kind, without the silly hair of course and  brother, BIG or otherwise. No I am hoping that my NEW ADMIRER , who has featured this blog in a monthly periodical as Blog Of the Month, will make me into a CELEB type star, of the A catlist sort.

So I am going to have a makeover I think, have my whiskers trimmed, get brushed, and practice my Purr. I have already told HER that Catcrunch is just not good enough for my evening repast. I deserve something more gourmet. My sleeping places will have to be changed too. Its not enough to be shut in the kitchen at night and told to be a good boy. 

Really I should have a Gold Lame fringe on my rug, and it should be embroidered with precious gems. Celebs in the making need a publicist too. SHE wont do , SHE is not of the world just in it. I need someone who will get me on the One Show, and Hello Magazine, now that I am in the Envoy. I bet my admirer/Editor  sees a great rise in the Circulation as all the Filey felines make their carers read about me. Do you suppose I will be asked to carry the Olympic Torch from Filey to Reighton, I could manage that, with the help of some strategic  harness in place. Maybe I will be asked to open the new Development next Door on the site of the Old Crown.

Get your online Copy of the ENVOY here-I am in the September Edition. Paper copies, OKA the real thing are in Filey Library, and St Johns , St Thomas and St Oswalds churches -BY THE DOOR and by subscription.

A new place to sit

Did u think I had Gone?

Well I've been back at Kiaora now for 3 whole lovely days after my sojourn at Cayton Carr again. I was a pleasure for them all there  no doubt. I came home looking very brushed and happy. I have stopped whining for food every hour on the hour as it is just not working now I am back with HER (who thinks she should be obeyed). 

That ginger and white excuse for a cat has been trying to poach and encroach whilst I have been away. I know that, as the area around the back door and MY cat flap smells of that expensive Industrial Super Strength stain  and odour remover.

Yesterday we had a DRAMA here.
HE caught a stray mammal and put it in my Cat Box. SHE thought it was a baby mink, but the lovely  pink vet said it was a Ferret. Really SHE should have known that , growing up in the wilds of East Yorkshire. The Drama is over now -so if its yours you know where to go for it.